Write From The Inside Out

A professor at Pitt paid me a compliment that I greatly appreciated. She was critiquing how my characters talked. You see all my characters speak basically the same way: in my own version of Hemingway’s clipped, encoded dialogue. They don’t say all they want to say and sometimes what they do say is slightly oblique to the reader’s ears. But the professor said my characters had “different agendas.” In other words, my characters wanted different things.

In your own stories, don’t explain what your characters want. Let them show what they want through their actions and dialogue. Just make sure you know what they want. And they had better want different things. Write from the inside out.

My Life

Well, the jobfair at computer school…Hold on.  I’m at Hemingway’s and three young women (Jess, Stacie and Jammie) sitting at the bar asked me to take a picture of them…I took two pictures.  We talked for awhile and now I’m back with the pencil and pad.  The jobfair was a pep rally.  No jobs were open.  It cost me $15 to get my suit and tie out of the cleaners.

But I did get one good thing out of it.  I think the reason I don’t like teaching at a university is because the position is too structured: you have to follow the syllabus.  But if you tutor one on one…

So, I’ll start pursing positions of tutoring college students-no grade schoolers to 12th graders-but college students.  I can do that.

GHH

My Life

This morning the foot feels good.  I’m walking nearly normal. There’s another jobfair at the computer school today, a local university.  It’s 6:30 am and I’m about to step into the shower to get rid of this two week’s growth of beard.  The suit and tie are both ready.  The black boots are shined.

Students at the computer school are getting hired before me, students who applied for the same positions at the same companies that I’ve applied to.  One of the staff agreed with me that maybe with certain employers my advanced degree, MFA, hurts me rather than helps me.  Why hire a guy with a Masters?  He’s always going to be looking for something more than a customer service position.  And that’s true.  I didn’t get this MFA to make $10/hr.

A university is different.  It appreciates what a degree represents.  It wants all its employees to pursue knowledge.  Knowledge makes for a more valuable workforce.  So, I’m getting ready.

GHH

My Life

Yesterday, I checked my mail for the first time since Friday and found a birthday card from me dear, old mum.  There was a fat check in the card.  I tried to phone her to thank her but found that my long distance had been shut off .  Now I can get it turned back on.  I’ll try to call Mom from school today to thank her.

Last night Philadelphia won the World Series.

Halloween is tomorrow.

The election is Tuesday.

GHH

My Life

I made it to school.  I’m in the lunch room now.  It feels good to be back in school.  It feels good to sit in the computer room in front of a computer screen, doing finger drills.  I probably won’t stay until 3:30 but it’s good to be here.  I’ll probably do some Word before I leave.  The foot feels good although I still limp.  The Ibuprofen pain pills are the bomb.

One of the new students sitting across from me is saying grace over her food.  It’s the first time I’ve seen that here.  Everyone else is talking.  I guess she’s around fifty.  She’s here because she’s a displaced worker.  I’m writing.  My food is cheese, bread and a tomato.  I brought a small plastic bottle of water from home.  The water is out of the kitchen sink.

GHH

My Life

It’s 6:00 am Wednesday morning.  For the first time since Friday night I had a good night sleep because my foot was not hurting me.  I’ll be going to computer school today.

I made a copy of my DD-214 (to prove I was in the army) and will be mailing it to Social Security this morning so that I’ll start receiving a check every month beginning in December.  That will give me some income while I continue to search for a job.  I have no idea how much longer I’ll be allowed to attend school which is now my only source of income.  I’m still several months behind in my rent.

Well, my new semi-vegetarian, low-alcohol consumption life begins today.  I can’t have the gout incapacitate me for several days like I’ve been the past several days.  What would have happened if I’d just started a new job?  I’m 62 and a new employer would immediately have thought I was not physically up to holding down the job.

GHH

My Life

Whew!  What a tiring day (Tuesday).  For the first time since Friday I left my apartment.  The gout is no joke.  It hurts.  Spent most of the past four days either in bed or sprawled out on the sofa.  Hobbling around on only one foot really takes it out of you.  Plus I was usually too tired to eat.  Yesterday I ate nothing.

But this morning the foot was feeling better and I ventured out of my apartment to catch the 54C to Bloomfield to do a little shopping.  In the supermarket, with my pack slung across me and carrying my shopping basket, I hobbled through the store like a zombie.

Well, I made it back with a newspaper, potatoes, cheese, crackers, three Milky Way candy bars, a pound cake and a half gallon of Festival cookies in cream ice cream plus 50 tablets of Ibuprofen pain pills.  And no beer.

Now I’m back on the sofa and listening to classical music on the radio, reading the newspaper with a spoon in a cup of ice cream on the low table as I hope to be back at school tomorrow for the first time since Thursday.

GHH

Raymond Carver And Flash Fiction

Raymond Carver was not known as a flash fiction writer although several of his stories in the break through collection, What We Talk About When We Talk About Love were flash fiction short.  What Carver was known for and will forever be identified with is “Minimalism,” a term he came to feel ambivalent about.

For me, What We Talk About When We Talk About Love proved that in writing a very short story less could be more.  It wasn’t that minimalism left things out.  It was that minimalism compressed everything into a smaller space.  Nothing was lost in a Carver story; but much was implied.

Raymond Carver may not have been the father of flash fiction but minimalism showed beyond doubt that less could be more.

Here Are 12 Great Stories To Read

There are 12 short stories on this blog for your reading pleasure.  Just go to the sidebar and under Categories click on “Flash Fiction Stories.”  Once you read to the bottom of a page of stories just click on the link to read more stories.  You can do this until you’ve read all the stories on the site.  The stories are:

When I Was A Young Man

La Dolce Vita

The Cathedral Of Learning

The End Of Innocence

The Twenty Dollar Suit

In The Shadow Of The Cathedral Of Learning

Life Is Art

Pittsburgh Snow

California Dreamin’

Oakland Nights

Uptown

Schenley Park

My Life

My right foot is still swollen but is slowly getting better.  Still, I don’t know if it’ll be healed enough for me to go to school tomorrow.  I don’t know if I’ll be able to walk on it.  I’ve already missed four days this month because of the gout.  I’ve missed more days this month then any month since January.  Well, this is a real wake-up call for me.  I’ve accepted the fact that beer causes me to get the gout.

It’s only a few minutes before the Giants play the Steelers right here in Pittsburgh.  They’re going to play on Fox TV and I get Fox pretty good.  I’ve never been to a regular season Steelers game.  I went to a pre-season game once and it was such a spectacle that that night I dreamt about the game all night long.

Well, because of my foot I haven’t been able to leave my apartment to check my mail since Friday.  Friday was my 62nd birthday.  When I do check my mail there should be something from Social Security that I have to complete and send back in order to start getting my early retirement checks in December.  Also, I wouldn’t be surprised if there was a birthday card with some money in it.  That’s the kind of thing my older sister and me old mum would do.  They do it even when it’s not my birthday.  They know I’m going through bad financial times.  I’m a bachelor with no kids.

It’s good to have family that cares about you.

GHH

When Do You End A Flash Fiction Story?

The classic short story has a beginning, middle and end.  So does the flash fiction story.  It’s just that the beginning of a flash fiction story is as short as possible; the middle is the largest part of the story and the ending is the payoff.  How do you know what the payoff is?

The payoff will be one of these three basic endings: summation, change in direction or an epiphany.

A summation ties all the lose ends together with a statement or action that throws the rest of the story into relief.

A change in direction takes the story into a new, unexpected trajectory.

An epiphany is a realization, a deep insight that a character in the story has or that the reader has.

As soon as this payoff is given (this article is ending with a summation) the story is over.

A Flash Fiction Check List

Keep the intro short.

Keep the number of characters to a minimum.

Use dialogue to bring the characters to life.

Have the characters “act out” the story.

If you want examples of how these four suggestions actually play out in a flash fiction story, you will find several examples in the sidebar under Categories at the link Flash Fiction Stories

What’s Your Writing Style?

Every writer should be aware of his or her own writing style.  Why?  The more aware you are of your style the better you’ll be able to make it distinctive.  Why should you be concerned with how distinctive your style is?  Your style is your literary signature.  It helps to separate you from other writers in your genre.  It helps your work to stand out.

Do you like long or short sentences?  Do you use absolutely concrete language or do you like the flourish of a well placed metaphor?  Do your stories end with finality or are they left open to interpretation?

Just remember that authentic style is never imposed on a story.  Authentic style is the essence of the story.  More importantly, it’s also the essence of the writer.

Saturday Morning

It’s Saturday around 10:45 am and I’m watching a cooking show on WQED Public Television.  I don’t know why I love these cooking shows.  I never use my oven.  If I have a roast and potatoes to cook I throw it all in the crock pot and forget about it.  Anything that I can’t cook on top of the stove I throw in the crock pot.

I didn’t leave my apartment yesterday because my right foot was so swollen and sensitive.  The extreme sensitivity is mostly gone today but the foot is still swollen.  I probably won’t go out today, either.  What a drag.  I hope I can go to computer school on Monday.  I’m missing too many days, especially since my basic six months were up a couple of months ago and my extension is probably up by now, too.  No school no income.  I won’t get my first social security check until December.

I haven’t heard from the local university or the health insurance company that I interviewed for.  The state hiring freeze is still in effect.  I think my best hope for employment is that after the national election the state hiring freeze will be lifted and I’m called to work.  In the mean time I have to keep looking for work.

Now Martin Yan’s China is on the television.  I sure could use some Chinese food now.  The only thing I have in the fridge is cooked turkey necks, green peppers and tomatoes.  I eat simply.

GHH

When I Was A Young Man (A Short Story)

I had written my quota of pages for that day. I left my apartment and a few minutes later I was walking around the big bend in the avenue. The Cathedral of Learning of the University of Pittsburgh stood tall and gray against the bright sky. There were lots of other young people wearing shorts, holding hands and eating ice cream cones. Someone called my name.

It was Lisa Graham. She was a friend of Sandy’s. Lisa’s dark hair was cut close to her skull in back and at the sides. It was full and curly on top and swept forward down over her right eye. She wore a white, sleeveless T-shirt with RELAX in red on the front, black lace gloves with no fingers, and black cloth stretch pants ending just below her knees. Some sort of black boxing shoes were on her feet. Her socks were bright red.

“What’s amusing?” she said.

“The way you dress. I like it. Come down to the place with me.”

I bought a newspaper along the way. I liked Lisa and her punk friends. I didn’t like the way there always seemed to be something strange about her eyes. I didn’t think she needed glasses. We sat at a table next to the big window on the Bouquet Street side. Lisa seemed younger than Sandy though they were the same age. We each had a mug of beer.

“Sandy told me you work for a supermarket chain,” she said.

“Five years.”

“I can’t imagine working anywhere five years.”

“It’s only three nights a week and four hours Sunday mornings. I saved my money while I was in the army.”

“I’m just floating through school. I don’t know what I want to do. I might be dead next year.”

“Hope not.”

“I’ll stay in school as long as my parents pay for it.”

I took a drink of my beer and looked out the window.

“Do you party?” she said.

“I like to have a good time.”

“No. I mean do you party?”

“Orgies?”

She laughed, sipped some of her beer and looked at me. She said, “Is beer all you do?”

“If I’m smart.”

“I have friends who can get you anything you want.”

“Oh?”

“Did you do anything in ‘Nam?”

“My unit was clean.”

She shrugged and finished her beer and left a little while later. It was a lovely day. I had done a good amount of writing that morning and now the sunny day made me happy. I opened the newspaper. A man confessed to slaughtering his wife and children. A chemical spill had forced an evacuation. A woman police officer emptied her revolver into her sleeping live-in boyfriend. A rapist claimed his fifth local victim. A family of seven was found killed execution style. Americans were reported still being held prisoners in Vietnam. I got up and threw the paper away.

The place got crowded. When Henry came in he didn’t see me. He started to walk back out. I called to him and he came over and sat at my table.

“What’s up, Henry?”

“Everything’s turning to shit. I need some bucks.”

“You had three gigs last week.”

“They didn’t show.”

“The band?”

“I’m sick of bands. No body wants to practise. They just want to jam. The bass player can’t get along with the drummer. The manager is screwing the chick keyboardist. The guitarist wants to sing more lead.”

“Will a twenty help?” I gave him the money.

“I had some people lined up to see us. The band said they were tired of playing the same place every week. It was a paying gig. So what if it is the same place. It was packed every Saturday night. You’ve seen it. We were bringing in an extra two thousand dollars every Saturday night. Manny loved us. There was never any trouble. All the frat parties lined up for the fall. They were going to give us a shot here on Wednesday nights. And the band doesn’t show up.”

He was a good singer and a great performer. I hated to hear the band was no more. Sandy walked in. A shoulder bag with a long strap was slung from her left shoulder. Her light brown, short hair was windblown and she was wearing sunglasses and a long, white sleeveless sundress. Her face, neck and arms were lightly tanned. She looked fresh and very young. She saw me and made her way up to the table. Henry looked up. She took off her sunglasses and smiled down at us. Henry stood up.

“Henry, this is Sandy Meyers. Sandy, Henry Porter.”

She reached to shake his hand. He held her hand, bowed slightly and kissed the back of her hand. She made a little curtsy. He gave her his chair and pulled another one over.

“Beer?” he said to Sandy.

“Than you.”

“Henry, let me.”

“You get the next round.”

He made his way to the bar. Sandy leaned against me and kissed me in the mouth.

“Miss me?” she said.

“Always.”

She rubbed her nose against mine. She took a brush from her shoulder bag and ran it several times through her hair. She took out a compact, looked at her hair and face and then snapped the compact shut and put it and the brush back in the shoulder bag. She pressed a leg against mine. She wormed her hand into mine and we held hands under the table. Henry came back. She let go of my hand and we kept our hands on top of the table.

I said, “Here’s to the best damn lead singer in Pittsburgh.”

“Are you a singer?”

“When I’m up there.”

“I play a little piano,” Sandy said.

“Really?”

“Chop sticks.”

“I’ll kill myself!” he said. “I swear it!”

“You don’t like chop sticks?”

“He just lost his band.”

“An easy five hundred a night,” he said. “All the suds we could drink. All kinds of frat parties lined up. They don’t show.”

She said, “I had a friend who was in an all girls band. Roadsickness. Ever hear of them?”

“You mean Carsickness,” he said.

“No. Roadsickness.”

“They play Pittsburgh?”

“Mainly house parties.”

“What happened?” he asked.

“Oh, somebody slept with somebody’s boyfriend.”

“Exactly,” he said. “It’s not music. It’s comedy.”

After the third round Henry left. Sandy and I sat and looked at each other. I said, “How was your week?”

“I found out I maxed two exams,” she said.

“Get out!”

“I’m going to get another four hours in work study, too.”

“Wonderful.”

“I had lewd thoughts about you.”

She looked around, leaned closer to me and pulled up her long white dress. Her legs were hairless and smooth. She wasn’t wearing a slip. I felt my groin tighten up. On the inside of her right thigh near the crotch of her white panties was a fading purplish mark the size of a half dollar. She threw her dress drown.

“Did I do that?”

“I call it your vampire kiss,” she said.

“I guess I got carried away.”

“You always get carried away. That’s what I like about making love to you.”

We were holding both of each other’s hands on the table top.

“How’s that?” I said.

“You don’t hide anything,” she said. “You don’t keep anything back. I think it’s the only time you totally let go. You’re very oral.”

“Must mean arrested development or something. You bring out the beast in me.”

“You were beastly before I met you.”

We talked about this and that and then I said, “How’s your friend Lisa?”

“Oh,” she said. “All right.”

“She was in here earlier.”

“Was she?”

“What does she do?”

“She’s a student.”

“What does she do for money?”

“Her parents have money.”

“Enough for her to buy drugs?”

She let go of my hands. “If her parents knew…”

“She deals, doesn’t she?”

“What she doesn’t use.”

“What’s she in to?”

She sat in silence and would not look at me. The silence stretched between us. I took her hands in mine. She looked me full in the face. Any time she did that I always felt her basic sincerity. It was the sort of vulnerability and sincerity most of us lose when we stop being very young children. It made me feel she was sitting beside me naked and unaware she was naked.

“You don’t use anything,” I said. “Do you?”

“I get high on us.”

It was that day, sitting at that table, that I realized I loved Sandy Meyers.

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